i Love You So...

i don't know but i really doesn't have any passion to write down a fashion things..

" i'll wait for you boy.. don't worry "

"seems useless but i just keep chasing this pavement without an ends"

"tick tock tick tock.. every second is everything"

"i hope time faster when you're not here..and time slower when you're here"

"i'm in Love and i admit it"

" i do cry a lot, but not in front of you! i just want you see my SMILE even it fakes"

" can i have a magic now? i need it! soon you'll fall under my spell"

" maybe i'm not the one you want, or you Love.. but i know i can be a better person for you i will do anything, i can be anything you love.. i want to be the one you LOVE..always"

" tons of fish in the water ? i want you not a fish! "

" don't you trust me when i said, i do everything for you! JUST FOR YOU "

i'm not wise enough for this..

i really Thanks to God i'm still alive until now

as a girls we always share advice

loves, and everything

talking always been easy

i admit in love with someone never been easy

maybe if i had a broken heart i try to make a big smile and wide innocent eyes

but i also crying for a whole week

But

i also learn from someone i actually loves too

someone that always put a trust on me, giving me a direction in life, and someone that be there..

someone that praise me well and know who i'm

i learn to be strong

"i try to love you and praise you and do everything for you even though i'm not the one you want or you love"

Life is Surprise

My Life full of Tragic like Magic

i always try to smile so you can see there's a smile in my face

i always try to look as pretty as i can so you can see me

i praise for you

i care for you

i always happy in front you

i give you a wonderful word

i won't let you know how sad or down i'm 

i won't do somekind like that

i just want you see i'm smiling 

i want you to see how happy I'm to look at you

:)

sorry for not posting anymore story

sorry for not posting more crap for a while

i'm kinda busy with my messed up life and i don't feel have any idea

so.. how's ur 2010 so far?

people tells me so far is nice and then they said "is just a beginning of the new mess"

hey you fucked up! you're just 16 or 17 years old teenager, what the fuck so hard with your life

you don't have to find a job to pay your house,rent and food for a day life

u don't need to get a money to buy your designer bag or shoes and load of clothes

awrite, teenager puberty problem ALWAYS been same

1st : LOVE PROBLEMS

you may think you rather die than you got a heartache trust me this heartache not gonna last

longer or make you die

2nd : friendship and social

your paranoia mind set with the backstabbing image from a movie or ever-heard story, or a two faces and 'highschool evil' oh God damn

3rd : parents

you always think this is what ruin your life so far , believe me your mind-set always like this

but HELLO can you just shut the fuck hell up and enjoy your life

because lately i can't fucking think and living my life

because i got people in my ear and yes i just grounded for a while (hope ended up soon)

this is really ruin my teenage day a bit..

okay i have a story about a girl you may ever met yet or not yet

This girl is curious about whole world

this girl is doesn't want a commitment

and she enjoying give a shit, enjoying see boys feel guilty

one day she do what she always did "make someone loves her and she want to leave him after that" she curious about this guy, and now she got him, and they get together for real with a status "in relationship" but she only played with this game and does not know that it can make this guy totally crazy about her, she can leave him any time but until now this guy still love him so she use him for being a companion while this guy can't have another girl

and she is mingle around like a bitch

she met a lot of guy

making out with them, making them crazy over her

use their money

and then she leave them

cause she DOESN'T WANT A COMMITMENT 

what do you think?

well i guess while we young, pretty and sexy , hot or attractive

why not?

we already said that we doesn't want commitment rite..

so why you have to complain about that?

you agree with that

so i think that's all from my crap post this time

thank you

see ya

XOXO

VEGAS BARBIE

people do belong each other

my friend, my very very good friend from Bandung just said a few days ago 

" i think you meant for each other "

at the first time i just think that totally bullshit

nobody meant for each other

i don't believe in true love

no i don't believe about match

none!

i always think that like all american rejects song "truth be told i miss you.. truth be told I'M LYING"

my theory is love is for having fun

after that you going to be die

that's my first though

and i all i think is playing a game

until now

all thing was different

now i believe what my friend said to me

people do belong to each other

people do meant for each other

and i just want to change all american rejects lyrics into

" truth be told i miss you, and truth be told i really do"

and it feels awkward actually

geez..

my good friend tell me again 

" don't ever look back "

i try to 

but i'm not kind of people that can leave over something!

for God sake i can't leave him behind

i would stay

i don't care what happen i would stay..

"You're growing up, and the rain sort of remains on the branches of a tree that will someday rule the Earth, and it's good that there is rain. It clears the month of your sorry rainbow expressions, and it clears the streets of the silent armies, so we can dance."

wish i know what to do

hey baby

what are you doing there

i'm here crying

remembering you walk out

where are you

are you remember me..

see the sky never be the same

i pass the living room where we use to sit

it hurts

my tears drop sure crying

i knoww..

is not a time to ask for your heart

i knoow..

i will crying

i know..

i will miss you a lot

yes i miss you miss you miss you...

i want you to happy darling

yes i want you to happy

how if i wish upon a star to stop my heartbeat today

wish upon a star i move 

i love you love you

but..

i can't stay longer

i'm lying 

wish i can swallow a purple pills

wish i can sleep all day

wish i can get out 

wish i know what to do

i'm sorry..

tears drop do crying

tears drop falling

this is torn apart my heart

let hear the sun and feel the summer

no no

there's no more summer

let's hear the wolf crying in the middle of winter

wish my lash back to dry again

wish i know what to do

i can't hug your back

i can't hear your heartbeat no more

well i tell you now that i don't know love but i keep saying it everyday

as the title i wrote

so uhm.. yea i just saying the truth

okay everybody, do you know love?

well you can say is emotion,yes everybody feels it

well what loves feels like? do you really know it exactly??

i mean there's no one in the world know what love is

love for everyone is different

maybe for me love is only a emotion (as example)

maybe for someone love is a LUST

and for any other people love is money

love is you

love is when two people more than like with each other

love is a sacrifice 

love is something ordinary

love is a feeling that make you awake all night long

love is a butterfly on my stomach

love is sex

love is how i feel with her

love is how i feel about him

well it could be anything

each other?

well i mean there's a unilaterally love

when someone just love someone but someone they love maybe doesn't feel the same

is still love

i think...

if you think love is only for a couple 

you are totally wrong

well it's depends how you see this world

how you see everyone

how you see classify love

how you prove your feeling

love not always sex

love not always you

love not always marriage

love not always diamond ring

love not always money

how do you classify this whole thing in this world

and how do you think about someone special

there you go 

you know what love is after that

maybe for you love is HIM/HER

and maybe for me love is a reaction if i see someone i see them very perfection,i see them very beautiful and it give me feeling so comfortable and in other ways very nervous

and in other way i want to be with that person everyday,each time of my steps and even in my whole life

i keep say "I LOVE YOU"

so if i say that

means " honey i love you because, i see you perfection in my eyes,even everybody say you're a bad things/guy but for me you are beautiful i hate myself if one day i stop loving you,i want to spend everyday,everynight,each step of my life with you because you just part of my life and i don't want to leave you behind. i want you stay with me please"

but not everybody gonna say that long word everyday every minute rite

so everybody just say "i love you"

that's why it's so simple

but i love you not always means something

if you say it with you heart it feels warm

but if don't

is just a word

without any means

maybe i'm not a writer,philosopher,or whatever good with words and human feeling

but i know what i feel each day and each step in my life

and this is just how i see this whole thing in this world

xoxo

VEGAS BARBIE

a day life with me feels like..

night little rabbit..

well a day as me is plain!

really

but i have an amazing things

like a family,hobbies,and problems

yes i have a problems more than happiness in my life

trust me

i have amazing mom that superr can rule the world

yeup that's me and my mom, she really young isn't it?

yeah she totally gorgeous fashionable

she really take care of me and my beauty

really trust me she can buy me tons of labels to cheer up my mood

and she totally care my body

i have amazing cousin,brother,sister

this is me and my cousin when we holiday to Kuala lumpur and have a trip to Melaca

my day is about MONEY,LABELS,FUTURE,LOVE

hahaha

i love stiletto , i really love it!

i wear it everywhere, i love it!

and i love taking a picture and addicted to makeup

trust me i have a skills

and i love edit my picture,

 i love holidays more than everything

i love my boyfriend more than any boys i passed by in my life

i love chanel, like always and i always love deden siswanto design and biyan

you know who's my friend? you think you know ? you better be quiet because you just judging my life

my friends i have amazing friends

AND I DO HAVE BEST FRIEND IN MY WHOLE LIFE IS

NISA SANI 

i met her when we was in 4th grade, as a new student

ANINDITHA 

is one of my favorite girl in town

and FRINDA

she's sweetest thing i ever met

and yes i do have another favorite girl in town

like this

this one is naida and me, well i love her as a girl-friend not lover

she's pretty cool while other people pretty annoying

this is picture having a trip to NYC

and

this is a friend that really like a big family

LOVES THEM SO MUCH!

life never be so perfect without them

i told you that i always love labels,yes i love shop

thank for my mom for giving me that

and i hate CAMPING!

yes i do hate that

i hate nature

i hate a small crap tent

i'm sorry but i really hate that in my life

don't ever try to force me to do that please because i hate it

WELL DO I HAVE A PERFECT LIFE?

NO-OH NOT AT ALL

WELL I DO HAVE A PERFECT FRIEND,FAMILY,LOVER

BUT I DONT HAVE A PERFECT LIFE

THIS PROBLEMS EVERYDAY GIVE A SHIT ON MY HEAD

my currently obsession is

drew barrymore

audrey kitching and hanna beth

victorias angel

they super sexy,beautiful,and perfect

i think that's all for now

i just share a little thing about my life

oh yeah

i have a tons of LV,chanel,and gucci on my closet and all REAL

and my favorite chanel wallet well i need to change it as soon as possible

because someone already wear it

i really need to change it as soon as possible

i never wear fake! trust me, haha

okay that's all

xox

VEGAS BARBIE

well you know my real name is

Arhadita

i just too love him >,<

all words about love in this blog is for him baby

<3

Sayang?

untuk kamu si bangsat yang tersayang..

untuk kamu yang aku sayang, siapapun itu jangan pernah tanya

kamu si bangsat siapapun kamu jangan pernah tanya "itu aku?"

untuk kamu, iya ini untuk kamu jangan tanya dan nikmati rasa sayang aku untuk kamu..

karena selama ini..

aku udah terlalu sayang sama kamu, sampai-sampai aku sebel dan lebih baik aku gak sadar adanya hidup

aku suka sama kamu, sampai-sampai aku gak suka aku sadar punya kamu

aku cinta sama kamu, sampai-sampai aku bosan untuk cinta sama hidupku sendiri

lebih baik cinta kamu daripada aku mencintai hidup aku sendiri

karena apa artinya kalau aku hidup tapi gak ada kamu brengsek..

karena kalo sampe aku terus-terusan aku sadar adanya kamu, adanya kita, adanya hidup,adanya cinta aku harus sadar adanya perpisahan,sadar adanya air mata,sadar adanya sakit hati.

aku sebel kalau aku harus sayang kamu dan manggil kamu sayang

karena aku jadi berfikir gimana kalau nanti bukan kamu yang aku panggil sayang lagi..

AH!

aku itu berlebihan, aku jadi sebel sama kamu!

aku sebel kalau aku harus sama kamu, jadi lebih baik aku pergi sendiri daripada ditinggal kamu sendiri..

aku sebel sama kamu!

aku lebih baik gak tau ada kamu dan pergi jauh-jauh kalu berujung didiemin ataupun ditinggalin..

kalau aku bilang kamu anugrah, gimana selanjutnya? aku harap aku tidak akan bilang kamu musibah..

cintaku...

aku selalu merasa bersalah jika kamu bilang "aku sayang banget sama kamu" karena aku tau aku terlalu banyak kekurangan dan itu bikin aku gak pantes buat kamu...

aku selalu merasa bersalah kalo kamu bilang "aku bisa ngertiin kamu,selalu" seakan aku selalu salah! seakan aku selalu yang melakukan kesalahan! seakan aku buruk! seakan akulah penyebab semua keburukan! kamu bikin aku merasa aku itu rendah!

tapi cinta aku hargai apa yang keluar dari mulut kamu walaupun kamu gak tau aku nangis di dalam hati..

my baby..

aku sayang sama kamu..

biasa ya?

aku cinta kamu..

standar ya?

gini deh..

aku sayang kamu karena aku cinta kamu

karena mungkin aku kasih segalanya untuk kamu

mungkin kamu gak ngasih aku bunga,

mungkin kamu gak kasih aku barang ber-merk

mungkin kamu gak bikinin aku puisi

mungkin kamu gak bikinin aku lagu

mungkin kamu gak ada waktu untuk bikin love notes

mungkin kamu bikin aku kesel

mungkin kamu bikin aku nangis

tapi semua itu aku lupakan karena aku menghargai setiap perilaku kamu ke aku

setiap mungkin hal kecil yang selalu aku bikin aku senyum

seperti kamu paham aku

kamu hargai aku

kamu sayang aku

kamu selalu ngurusin aku kalau aku gak bisa gerak sama sekali

kamu ngambilin air putih kalo tenggorokan aku sakit

kamu beresin barangku kalo aku bad mood

kamu peduli sama aku

dan cukup denger suara kamu

aku sayang kamu kan baby..

kamu itu sayangku yang paling brengsek dan paling bangsat

karena kamu udah bikin aku bahagia diluar dari batas , kamu udah bikin aku sayang diluar dari batas..

kamu memang bener-bener bangsat sayangku...

dan kalau sampe kita pisah 

aku lebih baik gak pernah kenal kamu daripada berakhir buruk cinta..

untuk kamu

si bangsat yang tersayang

xoxo

VEGAS BARBIE

things never end

who said your life so f*ing hard?

well you do said your mom murder your boyfriend

and who said we're living over dead body

it's only in your head!

your lips taste pain

your eyes see dead

your heart is dark

your blood stop

what you can do

when you feel your lover on your head

over and over tell everybody that crying taste sweetest as candy

your skin glowing when the night come

and the sun will crying over you

swallow candy in empty eyes

you call him as romantic scene

you hold my hand with pain

you cut your word for him

you paint his lips with your blood

what he want from you dear?

are he want you to be famous as your virginity

he gave you pain

he gave you kiss

he gave you lust

he gave you nothing

you gave whole of you

now you suffer

raise up

leave him

you're not with him again

he left you

the sun crying over you

the sky gave it thunder for you

the moon laugh over you

and the star kick your ass

what do you need to make it happen

are you need me to pull over yourself

you only hear a lust whisper from his mouth

and you only hear money thing from your sex

and at the end you wish the story ended

but it lies in your blood

so kiss goodbye...